Guiding words for 2014.

So, it's already March 24th and while I have been thinking about my guiding words for 2014, it's taken me a while to come to some clarity. 

Of course I can't pick just one. That would be way too easy and I'm far too complicated and contemplative for that :)

So without further delay, here are my guiding words for 2014...

My overarching theme for 2014 is to be ruled by love. I want love to rule my heart, mind, decisions and of course, my relationships. I've been realizing that more often that not, fear is my default. In 2014, I'm committed to changing that - committed to making love my default. I'm longing to to be ruled by love and not fear, judgement, shame or condemnation.

What do I mean by being ruled by fear? I'm talking about when I am tempted toward perfectionism and image control. People pleasing. Making decisions because I feel obligated to do something instead of being drawn to make a decision or commitment. The need to be in control. Being afraid of conflict or suppressing my feelings. Insecurity. Lack of trust. Beating myself up over past mistakes. I'm learning and coming to terms with the reality that all of these are rooted in fear. 

I want to be ruled by love. I want to live light and carefree, to learn the unforced rhythms of grace.
I want to open my hands wider and unclench my fists. To show mercy and compassion toward myself and others. To learn what it means to walk in step with the Spirit. To live with surrender. And forgiveness. To love deeply and with abandon. To trust like a little child. To embrace uncertainty and imperfection. To share my heart. I want love to become my default.
I choose love and so I'm giving up fear - not just for lent, but for all of 2014. I'm asking God to write LOVE on the tablet of my heart (Proverbs 3:3). I'm desiring it to mark me and define me.

Love is my true identity. Now I just need to walk in it.

Under that umbrella of the rule of love comes a few more guiding theme words...

1. Listen. 

The idea behind this is speaking less and listening more. 

It's about being quick to listen, slow to speak.  

Slow to interrupt.  Slow to argue.  Slow to be defensive.  Slow to become offended.  Slow to have the last word. 

It's about asking better questions and being more others oriented. It's about having the discipline to only give my opinions when asked.

It's about really listening. And not just thinking about what I'm about to say next. It's about developing the discernment to know when to speak and when to be quiet. Tricky indeed.

2. Clarity. 

Along with this goes the idea of letting my 'yes be yes and my no being no'. Saying what I mean. Not allowing feelings to build up or become repressed (especially since I'm learning that as an Enneagram 1, my vice is resentment - I want to be aware and careful).

Clarity means truth telling. It means no games.

The nice thing about a spouse (well there are lots, really) is that Steve is helping me see how sometimes I lack clarity when communicating and I don't always come right out and say what I mean. I'd love that to change in 2014.

In summary, listen - clarity - the rule of LOVE. Those are my guiding words for 2014.

So, there you have it. A few months late, but no biggie. Here we go...

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

 1 Corinthians 13:3

Just for fun.

This post is pure fun. So if you're in the mood for something deeper and more thought provoking, you might want to take a pass on this one.

In the spirit of celebrating what is good and beautiful, I was inspired by a recent conversation with some friends about my favourite spots to eat in Niagara.

Ribs from Memphis Fire

Dinner at Lake House

With some help from Steve, here's what I came up with:

Favourite coffee shop: Conversations Cafe. Hands down best lattes. Plus my friend Deb owns the place and she rocks.

Favourite bakery: De La Terre. The brownies are to die for. For real.

Favourite breakfast spots: Super hard to narrow it down. So - I created some categories :)

Best location and atmosphere - Butterballs in the Jordan hollow.
Best food and ambiance - On the Twenty in Jordan Village.

Best (and only that I've ever tried!) breakfast poutine - Cosmos in Thorold on Front St.
Best new spot (with great home fries) - Bistro 41 in Vineland on Victoria Ave.

Favourite chip wagon: MJ's Own Munchies. They even give you free fries on your birthday!

Favourite spots for dinner: The Lake House and The Old Winery.

Favourite atmosphere: The Keg.

Favourite Fish and Chips: The Irish Harp Pub.

Best value: Cats Caboose. You can't beat the $8 lunch menu.

Favourite BBQ: Memphis Fire. Worth the drive. So fun. Reasonable too. Kid-friendly. Amazing food! Try a milkshake too :)

Favourite ice cream spot: Avondale Dairy Bar. I always get soft yogurt ice cream with whatever fresh fruit is in season. Delish.

Favourite food truck: El Gastronomo. Love the fish tacos.

I gotta brag for a second and say that I'm also dying to check out Ravine Vineyard restaurant in St. David's as my brother, Drew (a.k.a. "the chef" to us) just got hired.

All this talk about food is making me super hungry!

Irish Coffee anyone?

Just for fun and because it's St. Patrick's day, I thought I would share some tips on how to make an amazing Irish coffee.

Last fall I was in Bush Mills, Northern Ireland for an unforgettable weekend with my Auntie Tish and my cousin Thomas and his most lovely wife, Barbara. On that weekend Thomas was determined to make me an Irish coffee. My sister, Leah and her husband, Craig had experienced one of his creations the year prior and raved about it. The only problem was that there was a festival of sorts on that particular weekend and the Distillery shop closed early for the day. I'm not even kidding when I tell you that Thomas asked them to open up the distillery for the Canadians (who was really just me - that's right one Canadian) who happened to be visiting and in need of a highly anticipated and previously promised Irish coffee. If you've ever been to Ireland, you'll know that of course they opened up the shop to sell him some whiskey.

So....I'll let you in on some family secrets...:)

You must use the Single Malt Irish Whiskey made at the Bush Mills Distillery.

It's extremely important to steam the glass first - using boiling water. I'm told that this step is crucial :)

First goes in the whiskey and then the coffee.

Top it off with whipped cream that you prepared ahead of time. Let the heat of the coffee cause it to glide off the spoon.

The Finished Product.

Cheers!

This and that. March Break 2014.

Yesterday felt like spring. Our windows were open. Birds were singing. The girls were playing with sidewalk chalk and bikes were out...

Today on the other hand is a snow storm. Plans are cancelled. It's a hot chocolate-and-tea-drinking kind of day... 

Crazy weather for March Break.

March came in like a lion, which means it should go out like a lamb, right? Here's to hoping!

Here's what I'm listening to on repeat these days:

Let it Go (from Frozen)

Oceans (Hillsong United)

Here are a few things I'm meditating on these days:

Matthew 11:28-30  “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” (The Message)

1 Peter 5: 6-7 So be content with who you are, and don’t put on airs. God’s strong hand is on you; he’ll promote you at the right time. Live carefree before God; he is most careful with you. (The Message)

Here's what I'm reading as of late:

I met this author - Rachel Macy Stafford - at her book signing last week at Indigo in Burlington and instantly connected with her.  I'm in the early part of her book and LOVING it.

Eva and I are in a Mother-Daughter book club and our latest book is none other than Anne of Green Gables by Lucy Maud Montgomery. Here we are reading it together (although you can barely see her). It's quite possible that I am enjoying the book more than her :)

And lastly, here's what I'm grateful for:

longer days and more sunlight (although you can't see the sun today!)
pussy willows in my vase

sleeping in and no school lunches to make for the week

Because I'm starting to run again and currently training for a 5 km (again), I couldn't resist sharing this post: http://www.sortacrunchy.net/sortacrunchy/2010/06/9-lessons-on-parenting-im-learning-from-running.html

     

Hope you're having a great week! Let's choose thankfulness and be on the lookout for beauty...because so often when we are on the lookout for beauty, we find it...